Repetition!!!

They say it takes the average person 25 times to learn something.. I would do anything to have a houseful of average people…

Having to not repeat myself more than 25 times to my children would be a vacation for my vocal chords… I sometimes wonder maybe I am too hard on my kids maybe I expect to much from them, but I also remember that I have 3 boys, I am raising someones future husband, someones dad, and someone who will go out into the world and contribute to society..

The kids and I have been together for 5 years now, you would think by now they would know me and understand what I expect. Well if you do think that you are wrong!!!!

That’s 365 days of us waiting in the parking lot after school for an extra 25 minutes because you are always the last kid out of the locker room.

That’s 1865 days, of me explaining that the dog needs to go out more than 5 min at a time.  I mean Seriously can you pee and poop in under 5 min, No you cannot,  and, you don’t have to locate and sniff out the perfect location to kill the grass..

That’s 1865 days of me explaining to you how to load the dishwasher efficiently… I mean seriously you can’t just throw the dishes in there anyway you feel like it, you can’t stack dish on top of dish on top of dish, they don’t come clean.  I have even gone to the point of suggesting you eat off those dirty dishes!!!!

Now keep in mind I have 3 children living in this house with me, So technically that is me telling you not overload the washer or the dryer 5475 times.

5475 explanations of why it is necessary to brush your teeth at a minimum of twice a day, Oh wait make that 10950 explanations, 7 cavities, and a root canal of why you should brush your teeth daily..

1865 days of me tripping over shoes and book bags in front of the door even after the most recent incident referred to in one of my earlier stories.. Snow days!!!

So, to my future daughter-in-laws I tried to teach them everything they will need to be good husbands, fathers and men..  Let’s hope in the 4 years I have left with these precious boys the will finally get that they need to leave the house in clean clothes, they will learn to get along with others, they will not leave their dirty laundry all over your house, and you will not have to ask them something more than 25 times!!!!

Now that I’m through with the venting, and thinking about all  this, I have a Life lesson to share as a parent you might need to repeat yourself a million times, you might be stressed to the max about why your children can’t just do what you ask without being told a million times just remember life is short enjoy all the moments even the ones that turn your hair grey.. Find the laughter in all of it.. I only have 4928 more goodnight hugs and kisses before they go off to be adults!!!!

Fashion Sense!!!

First I need to explain myself a little! I am a mother of 3 teenage boys.  My parenting style is honest open and very direct. You know that saying “curiosity killed the cat” well I firmly believe it.  There is nothing left unsaid or any mysteries in our home.. If you ask we will tell you.. I truly believe if you are informed it makes it less likely that you will try stupid things…

Ps.. I also have the vocabulary of a “trucker”

Now, I have these three teenage boys with three completely different styles.  I have one that never matches and doesn’t give two hoots about what others think.  Then there’s the completely normal one who throws on jeans and a t-shirt and we are good to go.  Then there’s the “other” kid, who needs to be told to change his clothes at a very bare minimum of once per morning…

As I have told you before I am not a morning person.. I get up with my kids every morning to make sure all is well.. Very limited speaking usually means everyone will make it out alive..

Kids today leave the house in almost anything, I would have never been caught dead in sweatpants at school!!!! I have my opinion on what I think is appropriate and unfortunately since I’m the boss I win!

I don’ think its appropriate for teenage boys to leave the house with no drawers.  I understand that some men really love the feeling of “free ballin” at least that’s what I am told it is called, but in my book you are not of “free ballin” age until you are 18 and graduated high school.

So now you can maybe imagine my thoughts when my “other” son decides to mix those two things!!! Let me just tell you

boy + “free ballin” + sweat pants = one unhappy mama!!!!

In this moment mother of the year strikes again!! As my unhappy I shouldn’t say a word because I’m definitely not a morning person mouth opens to say “OMG R U SERIOUS no one wants to see your junk swinging around all day!!!!

Can you imagine the looks on all three of their faces at this very moment priceless… Now before you judge In all reality I love my son and truly am just trying to protect him from complete humiliation.. In my day depantsing was very popular amongst teenage boys, maybe times have changed but I prefer to keep him safe!!!

Life lesson please do not leave the house without your tighty whities.. As your mother I would greatly appreciate it… He gets my point and stomps up those stairs to change into pants with a giant hole in the back.. OMG R U Serious are the only words that needed to come out of  my mouth.. It only took two times this morning thank goodness…

 

 

Potty Training

Potty training is something that every parent looks forward too!!!! There are many reasons why this is such a big important life event, cost of diapers, the fact that you don’t have to wipe someone elses but anymore. I remember being so happy when my first son learned to use the potty all on his own. Even more excited when my other 2 sons came already potty trained!!!! Big bonus there!!!

Now why, when I have three teenage boys am I writing about potty training you ask? I think at this moment there so much more to potty training than we realize when they are young… We are so excited for them when they accomplish this goal(more so for ourselves) We teach them the basics along the way. They leave little clues that maybe they need help learning how to do things. This is all finished without another thought at a pretty early age!!!

I haven’t thought about potty training in about 10 years until yesterday!!! OMG R U Serious!!!! I go upstairs to use the potty during my 15 min work break and to my surprise what do i find? Poop!!!! It’s on the toilet seat, Its in the toilet being accompanied by 30 pounds of toilet paper and an overflowing toilet!!!!!

So now my fifteen minute break, no longer a break… I ask around, anyone poop recently? and of course the response I get “yeah I took a crap” one of the great things about teenage boys!!!! “Well did you notice the mess you left?” ” I didn’t leave a mess” well now at this point I am not going to argue I know the horror I just had to clean up. Learning experience please always check that you have cleaned up after yourself and that you are not shoving 30# of tp down into the toilet for 3 little poops!!!

Potty training tips even at the ages of 12. 13, and 14!!!!! Proving that your job as a parent is never truly done!!!

Snow Days!!!!

What is a snow day?  They make all these movies that make it look like snow days are the best thing ever.. They are full of sled riding and normal kid mischief, hot chocolate and happy family memories! I beg to differ!!!

Its January the kids were home for 2 weeks for Christmas vacation, now I am all for vacations they are kids they definitely deserve a break. Now for some reason summer vacation 3 months no big deal but Christmas vacation 2 weeks and better believe I’m ready for them to get back to school.

So here we are the week of jan 5th 2015 Monday morning first day back to school after 2 weeks of vacation everything goes smoothly all 5 of us are happy that we are back to our routine… The weather is showing some cold weather later in the week possibly some snow no worries this is Ohio right what’s going on when you look out the window is your best guess.

Tuesday morning comes along my 3 teenage boys are getting ready piling there book bags, gym bags, shoes, hoodies(because we are teenagers and even though its cold outside we are too cool to wear coats) in front of the door. Now they’ve been told a hundred maybe a 1000 times not to pile their stuff in front of the door someone is going to fall,  can’t get out many reasons why we shouldn’t pile our things in front of the exit door.

Now my most wonderful boyfriend delivers the kids to school every morning because lets just say I don’t do mornings!!! He’s coming down stairs mumbling how he doesn’t feel good no worries he’ll be fine for 30 min, just get those kids off to school.

At this point I am confident they are all set to walk out that door I peacefully retire to my office to prepare for work. (I’m one of the lucky ones who works from home)and all of the sudden I hear screaming and yelling and all kinds of ruckus going on, of course my motherly instinct kicks in and I go running to the door to see what is going on, and OMG ARE YOU SERIOUS!!!!!

My poor boyfriend really wasn’t feeling good, he vomited all over the place, it hit him instantly and do to the heaping pile of book bags, gym bags, shoes and hoodies he cannot make it out the door!!!! As I go closer I see that all the book bags,gym bags, shoes and hoodies are now covered in vomit!!!! I’m going to  chalk that up as a snow day!!!!!

Then comes Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday 3 more snow days this time for real snow days..  Not one of those days led to happy neighborhood kids sledding and sharing hot cocoa and laughter it was too fricking cold!!! A whole extra week to Christmas vacation yay!!!!!

Now today Sunday Jan 11th I wake up knowing that those wonderful children of mine will return to school tomorrow, only one more day that I have to get through!!!!! They are ready to go back running out of things to do; I’m running out of strength to keep up with them, I pray for a peaceful uneventful day!!! I go to work everything is quiet and peaceful as I look out the window of my  office to see the poor man riding his bicycle down the busy slushy street carrying a gas can and OMG ARE YOU SERIOUS!!!! the dog is chasing the poor guy riding his bicycle down the busy slushy street carrying a gas can while my children make snow angels in the back yard!!!! Gotta love snow days!!!!!!